How to raise a girl
How to raise a girl . – since I have a daughter, this issue really worries me! Because of the proper education of girls depend on her relationship with men, her happiness, her fate. And since she is a future mother and wife, from her upbringing influences the atmosphere of her future family, the destiny of her children.
You ask: “Is it that serious? After all, we as educated? Grew up we were independent and we learn ourselves. And our daughters life will teach!”
And let’s remember, how, and most importantly who we were raised? Why now, many women think and feel themselves above men, wiser, smarter? Why in many families, the man plays a secondary role? How often we hear the phrase, “Men only want to bed…”
Look, as the woman took in the family place head of the family! Why do we no longer trust the upbringing of children by their own father? How many women live alone, and dreaming about the “perfect man”. Moreover, they are confident that all normal men have already discussed, were only drunks!
Answer the question: “Who has been raising the girls?” Right, mother and grandmother, i.e. women. Of course, all right, if not one “but”…
Our women go into force of circumstances (Civil, Finnish. Patriotic wars), has long lived without men. We even have a saying: “I’m a horse, I’m a bull, and I’m a woman and a man!” Women did all the work for ourselves and for the missing men!
Among other things, they raised the children, and girls including. The woman had become commander-in-chief in the family, not to dismiss children. Girls looking for a strong, courageous mothers grew same – hard and imperious. When the front came back men, as a rule, the sick, the injured and accustomed to alcohol, they did not seek to regain power, and women took over and care for their husbands.
And men perceived this situation ka tribute. After some time women woke up and began to demand from men care for children, family, attention, love… But it was not there! The train had already left! Husbands like irresponsible, passive position. And as a consequence women have ceased to respect and appreciate men, taking on the role of breadwinner and protector of their children and families.
And what about the younger girls? And they, of course, follow the example of mothers! They formed exactly the same attitude to men as mothers. If the mother loves, appreciates and respects her husband, and the girl will be with respect to her chosen. But if the mother thinks of her husband a worthless man, and the girl has to be formed the same opinion about all men.
Of course, a girl can and will understand that not all men are the same, but in the subconscious mind will be programmed behaviour of the mother, and she will unconsciously behave the same. Therefore, there is a saying: “Look at the mother and see his wife in the future!”
We are independent, strong and smart women are dominated by men (husbands, sons). No power, no motherly love, care…
We educate girls also: Holim and cherish them, for all they do. Calming himself: “grow – enough!”
And eventually the children grow up not adapted neither to independent living or to family relations. Remember that among your acquaintances, certainly, there are those who even at the age of 40 are taking financial help from their parents. And take it for granted, and it should be the opposite!
And grandchildren? They follow the example of their parents. They were also accustomed to receive care and love, but not to give! And they get bored with life. Because for them everything is decided, it does not bear any responsibility. But society throws them beer, cigarettes, drugs…
But the girl is in the first place, expectant mother, the Keeper of hearth and incentive for men!
How to raise a girl?
1.Down with stereotypes!
Every girl is taught that it is weak and defenseless girl. Every mother tries to protect her child, and we often hear: “don’t touch, stay away, etc.” Such neglect can cause girls groundless fears of the new and unknown. But the problem is the parents, rather to stimulate interest in discovering new things. Along with the neglect we forget to praise our children, and this should be done even for the smallest successes.
2. Watch your words
In raising children, namely daughter mom need to pay special attention to the words that she says to the girl. After all, the girl imitates the mother, who serves as the main example for her. Based on that and as my mom says, my daughter formed a picture of the inner world, her place in the external environment, as well as new horizons and the perception of reality. And what do we say to their daughters: “Girls do not behave!”. I.e. we characterize the act of a daughter on a sexual basis, and it is formed in the subconscious the thought of their “inferior”, because the boy means so you can act!
You also need to pay enough attention to the opinion of the girls, to be able to listen to her, don’t skimp on the praise, to rejoice in her achievements. Be sure to respond to the cry of the daughter, it will give her the confidence that she will help in a difficult situation and help you to feel confident and secure.
3. Right to punish!
Try to gently adjust the behavior of his daughter, without shouting and spanking. Even in the case of difficult and unpleasant situations, try to hold back and not tell the girl that she’s a rude, clumsy, helpless. Typically, such assessments are taken to heart and can cause the appearance of complexes and self-doubt. But in adolescence and may interfere with communication with peers and especially with the opposite sex. Try to calm down and explain to her daughter, as it was necessary to do in this situation.
In conclusion, I would like to cite a few rules that will help to educate a girl :
— Show love to the daughter.
Education rigor has its advantages, but in no case be allowed, what would your daughter constantly had won the love of parents! Excessive diligence, inability to understand myself and the victim complex – all of these can be the result of parental love;
— Tell your girl that she is beautiful, underline its advantages, do not laugh at the shortcomings. These recommendations mainly relate to the father, because it is for my daughter is the first and most important man in my life. From those relationships that will develop with our daughter dad, will build relations with the opposite sex.
— Teach the girl to understand people, talk about possible dangerous situations for her that could threaten not only her health or life, but also reputation.
— From childhood to teach the girl the basic skills of cleaning, washing and cooking.
— Greet the daughter’s desire to help others, to notice the pain of others are the main advantages of every woman.
— Cultivate daughter’s individuality, encourage the development of her personality.
— Encourage the initiative of the daughter, teach her to listen to the opinion of other people.
Here are seven rules that set psychologists, for the proper upbringing of girls. How to raise a real man without a father, read the article “How to raise a boy without a father” .
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