Dad and daughter
Some people believe that the daughter is closer to her mother, and the son – to the father, and if for a boy of no family history of Pope – this is a serious problem, we need girls in the father seems not as sharp. Yes, indeed psychologists know that girls very early start to identify with the mother. Throughout their childhood, they, without knowing it, equal to the mother, imitating her voice, intonation, manners and tastes. But from that little girl feels with her mother as a single organism, the father appears to her a completely different personality and therefore are especially remarkable.
Dad is no more interesting and different, not like mom. In their games with my dad baby gets the experience of communicating with a person of the other sex, in her mind fixed idea about the difference between a man and a woman. Finding this difference as something positive and joyful, the girl alleged in her femininity, based on opposites, unlike imitation mother.
The presence of the father in her daughter’s life is very important since the appearance of the girls at the light. This obviously affects their relationship in the future. In any case, the mother ceases to be the centre around which is organized the whole family life. Until recently, psychologists believed that the father begins to have meaning for girls older than three years when they awakened interest in the distinction between the sexes. Now, however, it became clear to scientists that identification by gender characteristic of the child from birth, and therefore the presence of the father at the early stages of development daughter absolutely necessary.
According to psychologists, on the nature of the relationship between father and daughter so nothing is affected, as the position of the mother. If a girl grows up in an atmosphere of mutual trust and love between the parents, she formed a friendly attitude to the father. In some families, especially those with non-working mothers, often is a kind of dictatorship woman single-handedly solve all the issues of education and farming. In this case, the father simply has no ability to show initiative or to participate in solving common family problems. To prevent such a situation, psychologists advise the woman not to go headlong into the role of housewife and mother, often remember that it is first and foremost a woman, and loving father of their children.
When the daughter sees the mother loves the father, but not as herself, but in a different way, perhaps in the soul of a child born of painful feelings of jealousy, but this experience required the girl to become a complete woman. If, on the contrary, in the proximity of mother and daughter is the father, and he is excluded from their relationship, in the minds of the girls attached the image of the rejected of men, on which it will focus, build in the future their behavior with the opposite sex.
If the mother lacks the wisdom to trust the husband of parenting worries, despite his other amaterski looking for trouble, and, moreover, to feel a sense of joy from what father perform parental functions in its own way, the child learns that the difference between mother and father – a positive fact. As we have said, in the child from birth, lives in the consciousness of the differences between a man and a woman. As he gets older his attitude is changing. In the power of parents to make a distinction between the sexes is interesting and remarkable in the eyes of a child, without exaggerating and without downplaying the role of women or men. Understanding that we are different but equal, – this is the best we can give to their children.
Recent research shows that many successful women ready for interesting work and a fantastic career, the so-called business lady, in childhood had a trusting relationship with their fathers. They tend to be more male type of thinking, they are able to compete with men, talking to them in their language. In our time, the type of business woman becomes more popular, many girls grow up with such “business” moms. The traditional distinction between feminine and masculine is gradually erased. However, psychologists say that some of the properties of either gender remain firm in our time. For example, men still some inherent selfishness and self-sufficiency, while women are more sensitive and responsive to other people’s problems.
Of course, the man will be hard to identify with a little girl, and therefore a sense of male brotherhood that is present in his relationship with his son, does not occur as natural and daughter. Indeed, not every dad is ready to play “store” or “doctor”. Whether business swordsmanship or race to the bottom in the apartment! However, to worry about it not worth it. Psychologists believe that the game has value only when it is interesting playing both sides. If the father really wants to play with her daughter in dolls – please! But when an adult does this through force, the game runs without any inspiration and imagination, without the desired result. Just do not forget that, apart from feeding the dolls, the father there are plenty of other ways to spend time with his daughter to mutual satisfaction.
It may seem surprising, but in a sense the father is easier to communicate with my daughter than with my son. Relationship two men can carry more conflicted and complex character, as to the son, as continuation of his “I”, any representative of the stronger sex is usually quite critical and jealously. A girl can Express themselves without restrictions and prejudices.
Father seeks daughter to pass experience with a kind and loving man. Justified is a huge confidence will be rewarded. For girls, who feel the value and significance of his personality in relationships with the opposite sex, thanks to his father he also becomes a favorite and meaningful.
But here’s what psychologists pay your attention, dear dad. For some men the relationship with her daughters become a serious problem precisely because of the opposite sexes. Fearing to cross the line that divides the relationship between the spouses and the relationship between parents and children, they prefer to keep daughters at a safe distance. Of course, we should not forget that the relationship with his wife and daughter are built on a completely different quality levels, only as a child, then they change as it grows. The baby girl has no notions of morality and decency, they gradually formed we adults. So first of all, parents need to clearly define what is permissible and what is – no. Psychologists warn that excessive looseness father – for example, Razguliay around the apartment with no clothes – may scare the younger girl, to cause confusion and embarrassment. If the father sets too great a distance, this creates a coldness in his relationship with his daughter.
As they Mature girls changing and the style of her fellowship with the father. That looked quite natural in a relationship with her little daughter (“I Want my dad just bought!”), suddenly completely unacceptable in a few years. It is important to always “keep abreast”, listening sensitively to the changes occurring with the child, to respect set them boundaries. The father is not considered with the desires and capabilities of the daughter, can hardly count on understanding.
The role of the male parent is always a bit of a dilettante. Woman who carried the child, has a wealth of experience with him even before birth. Due to the fact that for nine months the two were one and indivisible, between them, from birth, is established such close contact, in which the father is unlikely to qualify. He’s not supposed to. The Pope has his own mission. No worse and no better, and its just. And that’s fine!